Originally posted 21 December 2018
We have arrived! The kids and hubby finish school and work today! This is my last post of the year and I am ready and joyful to be disembarking from the train that is the hard work and busyness of the Autumn term. Choo choo! Each stop along the way has been well worth visiting, full of crafting, baking goodness and inspiration, with Kirstie’s Handmade Christmas being one of the main highlights. The festive season remains for me the most inspiring and creative time of the year and I already have a long list of makes for Christmas 2019!
This year I set out to follow my heart. It was my aim to be in tune with my inner voice, allowing it to lead and guide me along my creative journey. I have been visited by self doubt on numerous occasions but mainly I have managed to shut it out with a little help from my old friend determination. And when the jumble of ideas and anxieties were getting overwhelming, I had a timely meeting with my beautiful mentor Allison Sadler, who with love, warmth and wisdom, helped me to see through it all to gain some well needed clarity. I moved swiftly onwards concentrating on blogging and being true to my passion for seasonal exploring, living and crafting.
I find myself here and now knowing that creativity, truth, kindness and heart are and will forever be central to what I do. I am moving forwards along my path with continued clarity and conviction. I definitely do not have all the answers but I am ok with that. The Lucy of the past has just fallen off her chair! If you had told me last year that Lucy of the future would be happy to embrace the unknown, that I would be excited to step out of the security of my comfort zone, I would have dismissed your claims as ludicrous, but I would have hugged you for your faith in me!
One of my main aims for 2019 is to continue to push myself out of that comfort zone and take risks, because if being on Kirstie’s Handmade Christmas has taught me anything, it is that my fear, self doubt and hesitation can turn into so much love and positivity; from others yes, but for myself! And that my lovelies, is wonderful isn’t it? Love and pride in me! This feeling is not about winning, being better than others or success per se, it is about trying. I do believe I am a trier!
I have experienced a happiness and pride towards the end of this year that is all about trying really hard. It is not about reaching a destination, having got to where I have always wanted to be. In fact, there is no longer a destination on my map, just rest/‘taking stock’ stops along the way. Oh my goodness, this is where I blew my own mind the other day. This is where I kind of said, ‘doh!’ to myself because, and perhaps you already knew this, it is not about the destination, it is about the journey! I will forever be on this journey. I will never ever get to that magical utopia, that fictional dream of a life where I am earning the ‘right’ amount of money (I’d just like to earn some money thank you very much…2019 are you listening?!) or where I am the ‘perfect’ amount successful, thin, sorted … blah blah blah! You know? I’m here and I am where I am meant to be. I am moving, I am journeying and that means I am learning.
So here’s to being a trier! Here’s to the lessons learnt and the realisations of 2018! And here’s to the lessons yet to be learnt and all the efforts yet to be made in 2019! In the words of Dory, from Finding Nemo, ‘Just Keep Swimming!’
And thank you for being here, for supporting me and sending me much love and kindness along my journey. I am so very grateful for you.
Merry Christmas angels. May your festive time be what you want it to be. And if this is or will be a difficult time for you, I am sending you virtual cuddles, so much love and gentle thoughts, always.
Take care of your gorgeous selves and see you next year!
Lots of love,